What A Divorce Coach Can Do For You! By Dr. Michael Brooks

Did you know that most attorneys are not trained to act as Counselors or Divorce Coaches and cannot provide the proper emotional support that their clients need? As a result, the attorney and client spend hours discussing the emotional aspects of divorce and the client ends up paying a large bill and receives little more than a shoulder to cry on. Attorneys want to help you with the legal aspects of your divorce, not to be your Divorce coach or counselor. That’s not their job!

Many of my clients come to me with little or no energy left to accomplish what they want out of life (life’s battles). They say that there always seems to be a mountain to climb (major problem), and for others, a wall (major disaster) to run into. Does this sound familiar?

Divorce Coaching offers structure and holds clients responsible for assuming a proactive role. A Coach may recommend material for clients to read, work on, or refer to for future use. Clients can benefit by working with a Coach in setting realistic expectations for the process and receiving education about the options available for divorce. Being informed and prepared helps clients make important decisions with confidence. Guiding clients in clarifying their thoughts, needs, and concerns, in order to communicate more effectively, is another important function of the Coach. Clear, purposeful, and rational communication helps to ease tension and foster understanding between spouses, as well as parents and children.

Much like any crisis or trauma, the early emotions of a pending divorce include shock, disbelief, denial, anger, and the pain associated with the loss. Once the early emotions have been experienced, there is a need for people going through a divorce to make sure they continue to take the necessary steps in moving toward recovery. As with any significant loss that involves a meaningful relationship, divorce can lead someone to a place of anger, bitterness, and lonely despair. Dr. Mike will walk you through the critical role of forgiveness in divorce recovery. Especially when it comes to wrestling with issues, like trying to prove who’s right or wanting to get even.

In addition, many divorcing couples wind up in the traditional litigation route because they are reacting to fear, anger, and a desire for getting even and are not thinking about what will happen once the divorce battle has ended.

After the grief process has run its course, divorced men and women must begin to consider their next steps in getting back to a healthy level of functioning. While this may not necessarily mean starting a new romance there is a need to take stock and evaluate relationships with family members and friends.

Part of building a new life is the acceptance of having been divorced. There are key issues in starting over, these include the need to avoid a victim mindset, having a balanced life and building self-esteem, and considering the future in terms of family, jobs, and finances.

After the grief process has run its course, divorced men and women must begin to consider their next steps in getting back to a healthy level of functioning. While this may not necessarily mean starting a new romance there is a need to take stock and evaluate relationships with family members and friends.

Did you know that…
Americans divorce more than any country in the history of the world.
The divorce rate has increased in the U.S. every decade since 1890.

Dynamics of Divorce Coaching:
Delayed and later-life marriages are the norm for society today.
Divorce is often a lengthy process that can last for years.
The person who often seeks divorce coaching is the one who did not initiate the divorce proceedings.
Divorce coaches help repair and rebuild a life.
How the biological parents dealt with divorce literally determined the future of their sons and daughters.

What Divorce Coaching will do for you:
Help you manage the early emotions.
Move you towards acceptance.
Process the grief and loss.
Understand the grief cycle.
Do’s and don’t’s in your divorce.
Forgiveness and letting go.
Building a new life.
The Five Keys to starting over.
Barriers to new relationships.
Finding new relationships.
Now what? Living in a blended family.

Are you in the process of Divorce? Do you have a relationship that isn’t working, or that you want to improve and work on? Is your marriage in trouble, and is there still hope of reconciliation? Or do you need to end an unhealthy relationship? If you answered yes to any of these, I can help you as a Divorce Coach. You can call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878 if you have any questions.

Unexplained Behaviors Explained? (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Unexplained Behaviors Explained? (2)  By Dr. Michael Brooks

Have you ever wondered why someone, maybe a family member, a friend, even a co-worker, treats you so badly?  I certainly have, their behavior puzzles me and leaves me wondering why are some of these people so angry, defensive, mad, while other people we know are joking around when something just serious just happened. Then you have those who are so sensitive and serious, while others will not argue or fight and will avoid conflicts with you at all costs.

Hopefully, this article will make you want to do something about the people who make you feel miserable, worthless, and not valued. How would you like to know the hidden secrets in dealing with these people and having a good relationship with them? It can happen; you just have to learn what people’s motives are, what drives them to do the things they do. In my Counseling and coaching practice, I see many people struggling with relationships and, more often than not, are frustrated, tired, and just want to understand why people act the way they do.I have a cousin of mine that I’ve known for several years. He’s had his quirks that I didn’t understand these past several years, and now I see them as his issues and not mine.

In order to continue reading this article go to the following link below:

Every Day is a Friday (3) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Every Day is a Friday (3) By Dr. Michael Brooks Today, we’ll finish this article series on “Every Day is a Friday.” I think having a positive attitude is key to making Every Day is a Friday. What you think and dwell on or about negatively will impact you for that day. If you dread going to work and hate your boss or co-workers, that’s where your energy will go. Look for the good things in your job, be positive. Be thankful you have a job. If you can’t stand your job, then change things by getting a different job, or getting more education to move to a different position in the company you work for. There are positives in your life, you may just have to dig deeper to find them, but they are there! To continue reading this article go to the following link below: http://idontwantthisdivorce.com/2019/07/every-day-is-a-friday-3-by-dr-michael-brooks/

Making Every Day is a Friday is up to you, plan ahead to make it happen

Facing Your Giants (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Facing Your Giants (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks As I was walking out of the grocery store to put my grocery cart away, I turned and suddenly stood face to face with the old town gossip just two feet away. I and many others have been talked about by this woman in our small community. My mind raced as I looked at her and as she stared at me. I froze, I wanted to tell her off, yet my mouth prevented me from exposing the town gossip. I would have enjoyed doing this, but couldn’t bring myself to be like this woman. Why? I had every reason to let loose on her, right? I mean, she had attacked me and lied and gossiped…. To continue reading this article go to the following link below:
Facing Your Giants (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Are You Serious, You Want a Divorce? (5) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Are You Serious, You Want a Divorce? (5) By Dr. Michael Brooks We are continuing our article on “Are You Serious, You Want a Divorce?” Learn how to avoid the pitfalls of divorce and possibly save your marriage. There are several tips that can help you along the way of deciding what your next steps should be. “What do we do now,” is pretty important… Step three, ok, your relationship is still up in the air after you’ve talked, your not sure where your marriage is headed. You have no answers and yet neither of you wants to commit to getting a divorce, so, what do you do now? I think that this step in figuring “What do we do now,” is pretty important. I suggest starting building each other up, talk about your spouse’s positive attributes and what they mean to you. To continue reading this article go to the following link below:
Are You Serious, You Want a Divorce? (5) By Dr. Michael Brooks

dear excuses, PREPARE TO DIE (3) By Dr. Michael Brooks

dear excuses, PREPARE TO DIE (3) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Continuing from last weeks article. Another issue that I had to face was “what I didn’t know” about operating a fitness center. I kept thinking “what if I fail, I would be horrified and what would the community, my friends and family, think of me? Just the thought of this fitness center was taking me way out of my comfort zone; I like to know what’s in front of me. I have to be honest I was scared of the what if’s and not focused on the “I can do this.” The only way to overcome this is to do your research and plan well ahead.

No More excuses, put excuses behind you!

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Is Separating A Good Thing? (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Is Separating a Good Thing? (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

This is a tough question, and for many married couples who are struggling in a bad marriage, it’s one they ask themselves over and over again, “should we separate?” For some men and women, separation needs to happen for their sanity and for safety reasons to protect themselves and their children. For others, it’s just an excuse to end a relationship on their terms.

Are you considering a divorce or separation?

I can remember a man I knew who was wondering if a separation was something he needed to get his wife’s attention. I asked him what the purpose of it was? He said calmly, she’s checked out and I don’t see any movement on her part to be a part of this relationship. So, I am asking her to leave and think about what it is that she wants for her and our marriage. I am the one who pays all the bills, and she takes care of our kids. I honestly believe that she is seeing someone while I’m at work. Do you have proof I asked? No, I don’t, but she is not able to connect with me at all and trying to have a conversation with her is near impossible.

I asked him what is the purpose of planning a separation from your wife, what do you expect from her and how will she respond? I haven’t a clue he said, all I want is my wife to start being a wife and not a roommate. I provide for this family; I work hard for what we have. I get no thank you from her, and what makes matters worse, she doesn’t have to work whatsoever, she’s a very lucky woman. Do you acknowledge her as your wife and a mother to your children? Well, I sometimes do. I think recognizing her for all that she does around your home would go a long way in rebuilding your relationship with her. Some people need words of affirmation and to be noticed for what they do. We all need that for a healthy relationship. Can you do that I asked him? I suppose I can, do you think it’s worth it. Yes, I said.

Are you willing to hold off on your separation to see if you can at least jump start your marriage? He said he was and then put his trial separation on hold. I feel that his wife needed some form of recognition for all the work she had done to take care of the kids and be there for everyone. He started doing that, and amazing things began to happen. She started to open up, and he listened to her share the things that were in her heart. This my friends is just what she needed. Someone to appreciate who she was a mother and a wife.

Do you feel frustrated about your failing marriage or relationship? Do you need help in saving your marriage and family from divorce? Do you have a spouse or partner who isn’t communicating with you and you want it restored? Do you want help in learning good communication skills? Are you the partner who wants to end your relationship because it’s unhealthy? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. If you need help.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!