Avoid The Wrong Kind of People (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Avoid the Wrong Kind of People (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week we will talk about how to deal with gossips in your married life and the problems they can cause and how to avoid them. If your marriage is in trouble and you are looking for someone of the opposite sex to talk to about your marriage problems and think this is a good idea, think again. If you are having problems in your marriage, avoid these marriage killers.

  • Avoid sharing your personal marriage problems with the opposite sex
  • Don’t compare your spouse to others
  • Don’t seek advice from known gossips
  • Don’t meet the opposite sex for drinks after work
  • Avoid being alone with someone you’re attracted to
  • Avoid after work phone calls
Shocked Woman

Another group of people to avoid are the gossips in your life. They are the backbone of people spreading lies and disinformation. Ask yourself what is the purpose of gossiping about someone? Does gossip benefit the person being talked about? Gossips have caused much division in families, work, schools, and friends. I’ve learned over the years that those who gossip usually have no loyalty to anyone. They are despised by all. If you share any confidential information with a gossip, then plan on many knowing something that you shared in confidence. Never share your marriage problems with a gossip.

I shared a story a while back, and I like the storyline on this. The article “How to Stop A gossip in Their tracks,” By Dr. Michael Brooks, gave an example of dealing with a gossip in a church setting. I loved the setup of a gossip being caught in her own trap. Here is the story for your enjoyment.

Mildred, the church gossip stayed busy sticking her nose into other people’s business. Several members did not approve of her extracurricular activities but feared her enough to maintain their distance and silence.

She made a critical mistake one day when she accused Frank, a new church member, of being an alcoholic. She claimed she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town’s only bar one afternoon. She accused Frank in front of several church members that she saw his truck parked in front of the bar and wanted to know what he was doing there! Frank, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn’t explain or defend himself or deny anything.

Later that evening, Frank quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred’s house and walked home. He intentionally left it parked at her home all night!! (You gotta love Frank!) Needless to say, Mildred’s days of gossiping came to an abrupt end.

Don’t you just love how Mildred became the talk of the town? I wonder how many people laughed when they heard she was now the victim of her own gossip.

Next week I will explain the T.H.I.N.K. system and how that will keep you out of trouble and avoid the gossips in your life.

Are you afraid to confront the wrong kind of people in your life? Are you involved in a wrong kind of relationship and need help getting out of it? Do you have friends who are involved with drugs, alcohol and want you to join them, and you can’t say NO? Would you like a plan that can help you eliminate the wrong kind of people in your life? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then contact Dr. Mike for personal help and planning your next steps at 303.880.9878.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Life Coaching and Counseling Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone (303.880.9878) or via Zoom. The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of the Denver-metro area. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

Avoid The Wrong Kind of People (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Avoid the Wrong Kind of People (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

In the course of our lives, I’m sure we have come across people that were not good or healthy for us. Some of these people would ultimately get us into trouble and cause pain for those around us. Possibly people that may have changed the course of our lives and we still to this day regret getting involved with them. Are there people who you avoid today? Keep in mind that the wrong people will have a tendency to drag us down with them. I have seen over the years, many people follow the wrong crowd and have paid dearly with their marriages, their health, their integrity, and their families. For what reason but their own personal pleasures.The pain of divorce continues, until you get help!

The pain from an unhealthy relationship isn’t worth the headaches it will cause you!

I had a friend of mine back in the fourth grade named Pete. This kid was a trouble maker, and I knew it. I was a shy kid who didn’t have many friends; we had just moved to the states from Germany. Pete was a bully and kids were afraid of him. I saw Pete as someone who didn’t have a lot of friends as well. He often picked fights just to show our classmates he ruled our fourth-grade class. One day he walked up to a physically challenged boy in our class and hit him for no reason at all and started making fun of his disability. I knew right then and there I wanted to have nothing to do with Pete. I avoided him whenever I could. One day Pete decided to start hitting me because I avoided him. Being a shy kid, he eventually stopped hitting me because I wouldn’t fight back. Even at that early age, I knew Pete was someone that I should never hang around with; he was the wrong kind of person. Funny, how I knew that as a kid.

Are there specific people that you need to break off friendships with or avoid certain situations that could cause you to compromise your morals, ethics, or integrity? If you have a gut feeling about someone, who isn’t good to have a friendship with don’t! If you are listening to someone who wants you to compromise your integrity and wants you to be a part of it, run from that person as fast as you can!

I had a client many years ago who felt that he needed to spice up his marital relations with his wife. So he, without asking her subscribed to an adult channel so they both could watch it and get some ideas for their bedroom. She was appalled and forbid that he watches pornography in her presence. He thought his actions were innocent and let her know that she was a prude. His supposedly watching porn to help them in the bedroom became an addiction. He is now addicted to pornography, and both are divorced. She couldn’t deal with his addiction and felt emotionally cheated on. He kept telling her it was harmless, and she needed counseling. Pornography is one of the leading causes of divorce. Next week we will be covering dealing with gossips in your life.

Are you afraid to confront the wrong kind of people in your life? Are you involved in a wrong kind of relationship and need help getting out of it? Do you have friends who are involved with drugs, alcohol and want you to join them, and you can’t say NO? Would you like a plan that can help you eliminate the wrong kind of people in your life? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then contact Dr. Mike for personal help and planning your next steps at 303.880.9878.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Life Coaching and Counseling Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or Zoom. The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of the Denver-metro area. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

Start Your Impossibility Journey (2)

Start Your Impossibility Journey (2)

By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week, we will continue with making your impossibilities a reality with hard work and planning!

I’ve shared with you a while back an incident that changed my life forever. We just moved from Ansbach, Germany, and went to a family reunion in Minneapolis, Minnesota shortly after moving back to the states. I was eleven years old and a shy kid. My aunt Dorthy was sitting in her lounge chair and called me over; several family members were seated around her. She asked me in front of that group, ” Mikey, what do you want to be when you grow up”? I looked at her and at those seated around her and, in a whisper, said that I wanted to be a professional football player and play for the Minnesota Vikings. She laughed out loud and said, that’s impossible, you’re too small to play football. That crushed me to the core. I walked away defeated as an eleven-year-old boy. At the time, Bud Grant, a family member, was the head coach of the Minnesota Vikings.

The following summer being twelve, I saw a magazine ad with Joe Weider’s picture in it and him selling weight lifting equipment in the ad. The picture showed a man with lots of muscle lifting weights. I ordered the weight set and paid for it with the money I made from cutting grass. I was excited when the weight set was delivered. I opened the box in the garage and assembled the weights, and looked at the instruction booklet that came with the weights. I started lifting all summer. Then something came over me, a thought, then a motion picture in my mind playing my aunt’s statement that I was too small to play football and her laughing about what I said about playing professional football. Honestly, that drove me to work harder in the gym to prove to her that she was wrong. It’s amazing how someones negative remark can give you the incentive to go after an impossible dream.

So, think about what I have shared so far. Now, let’s move on to you, have you ever had someone tell you that something was impossible for you to do? I’m sure many of you have? Did you give up or become determined to prove them wrong and make it happen. It’s easy to give up on dreams because someone doesn’t believe in you and lets you know that your dreams are impossible. Remember this when someone tells you, “It can’t be done.” Just remember, those are their limits, not yours! I heard this many times growing up, you can’t do it. I’d like you to list those things that you were told that it’s either impossible or you can’t do it. What does that list look like and did you prove people wrong by your determination to make it happen?

I’d like to continue on with my story. By the time I was a freshman, I was pretty strong from lifting weights in my garage. By my sophomore year, I was the strongest kid in my High school. I had all kinds of lifting records for my school, and I went to a large High School in the Chicago area. I lived in the weightroom, I spent hours there. My aunt Dorthy was in the weight room as well, mentally that is. She said I was too small, and I am going to prove her wrong. I went on to play college ball, I coached college football, and went beyond that.

Next week, we will continue how to make your impossibilities become real with hard work and determination.

Dr. Mike has Zoom classes on “Boundaries in Dating,” By Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, on Thursdays. “If you’re interested in attending this class, it’s on Thursday from 5:30 to 6:30 PM. You’ll need to send Mike your email address to get a link for the Zoom class. Send your email address to mike@applicablecoaching.com. You can sit in and listen or be a participant. These classes are free.

If you are interested in any of these classes or have questions, send an email to mike@applicablecoaching.com or call 303.880.9878.

Do you feel like you’ve had people tell you that your dreams are impossible to achieve? Are you overcome by how big the impossibilities are that you face? Do you need help in making your impossibilities a reality? Do you want to know to overcome the fear of facing your impossibilities? Do you want help in managing your goals to make the impossibilities happen? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Zoom (if you want to have a Zoom meeting with Dr. Mike, send him an email at mike@applicablecoaching.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching and counseling for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

Have You Ever Wondered If There Is The Right Person To Date?

Have you ever wondered if there is the right person for you to date? You keep dating unhealthy people and repeating the same old cycle. Do you have dating boundaries in place? Are you settling for the wrong person?

Applicable Counseling and Coaching Services will be having classes on dating. If you’re needing help in picking the right kind of person to date, this class might be one you want to look into.

On Monday’s, Dr. Mike and Rana Justice will have Zoom classes on “Boundaries in Dating” By Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. “If you’re interested in attending this class, it’s on Monday from 6:00 to 7:00 PM (MST). You’ll need to send Mike your email address to get a link for the Zoom class. Send your email address to mike@applicablecoaching.com. You can sit in and listen or be a participant. These classes are free.

If you are interested in any of these classes or have questions, send an email to mike@applicablecoaching.com.

Don’t Allow Fear to Control You! (4)

Don’t Allow Fear to Control You! (4)

By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week, we will continue on how to deal with your fears so you can understand on how to manage them. Fears don’t always have to be hidden and cause embarrassment. Dealing with them will give you freedom.

Learn what causes you to fear, think about this for a moment. I think that this is your first important step in figuring out and identifying what your triggers are.  This first step will be the hardest one for you, but it’s especially important for your healing and overcoming your fears. If it’s stuck in your brain, you can’t move forward and overcome your fears. You must face your fears. So, write down the fears that you deal with on a daily basis and why you are fearful. That will help you take action and put a game plan together!

Think on the positive things in your life, don’t dwell on the negative fearful thoughts that keep you living in fear. Imagine the good things in your Life, when fear creeps in, immediately start looking at the good things going for you. You can control your thoughts in good ways, meaning you can control good and bad thoughts. You can plan your future with good positive thoughts, and a well-thought-out plan will get you there. Good plans help weed out your fears and keep you on track. Fear of the unknown is a big fear, a well-thought-out plan will help keep you stay focused. From personal experience, I know it works.

My next suggestion always works for me, as many of you know that I am an outdoor enthusiast. If I have a lot on my mind, I like to go for a walk and spend time alone. I figure things out by spending time with God. I always have a great conversation with Him. We all have to face our fears. Walking, hiking, riding a bike, whatever helps calm you and gives you time to think and figure out what your next steps will be, is helpful. If you constantly live in Fear, then Fear needs to be high on your priority list so you can deal with it. If you, don’t face your fears, it will consume your thoughts until it either controls your thinking or you control it. Either way, the next move is up to you!

In closing, don’t let fear decide how you live Life each day. Find someone you can talk to and start dealing with all your fears so you can live a happy life. 

Dr. Mike has Zoom classes on “Boundaries in Dating,” By Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, on Thursdays. “If you’re interested in attending this class, it’s on Thursday from 5:30 to 6:30 PM. You’ll need to send Mike your email address to get a link for the Zoom class. Send your email address to mike@applicablecoaching.com. You can sit in and listen or be a participant. These classes are free.

Don’t Allow Fear to Control You! (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Don’t Allow Fear to Control You! (1)

By Dr. Michael Brooks

How many of you have issues with fear? I know I do, and sometimes it gets in the way of life and my life’s enjoyments. There are many different fears that we all deal with, I don’t know of one person who isn’t afraid of something. If they tell you, they have no fears, then they are lying to you. In my humble opinion, I believe that your fears will be the number one obstacle that you will face in your lifetime. It’ll be the most difficult challenge you will ever have to face and the most important one to overcome in your life. Seriously, facing up to your fears and dealing with them will free you of letting your fears control your life.

All of us will experience fear at some point in our life, that is a matter of fact. It’s how we face it that will define us for the rest of our lives. We all have fears that can keep us stuck, and it can be uncomfortable making the needed changes to deal with our fear issues that we have.

Fear can be a good thing or a bad thing, just depends what side of the fence you’re on and what and why you have those fears. Me personally, a few of my biggest fears are heights, electric shocks, being in a speeding car, and some relationships. I have other fears but for the sake of this article and to keep it short, I will share those maybe in another article.

I’ll explain the one about heights that I listed and why. The reason for heights is one from being a dumb kid growing up in Germany and living on an Army base. We had the 101st airborne jump and land on the Army base we lived on. I would watch them jump out of the plane and land not more than 200 yards from our house. I was simply fascinated as these paratroopers that jumped and then landed near our home in an open field.

One day I got the bright idea I could jump just like they did and experience the floating down to the ground with a soft landing. We’ll my parents had a beach umbrella on our back patio deck. I decided that I could do the same thing with our umbrella. My mom and dad were busy that Saturday morning, so I managed to get the umbrella out of the stand and haul it upstairs to the second floor. I was seven at the time and quite resourceful to finding fun things to do. There was a pull-down attic ladder on the second floor of our house that went up to the roof and there was a roof window that you could climb up to and open. I managed to open it and get the umbrella on to the roof. I opened the umbrella looked where I would softly land and jumped from a two and a half story house.

Next week, we will continue with “Don’t Allow Fear to Control You.” Learn how to deal with these thoughts on fear so they don’t control you.

Dr. Mike has Zoom classes on “Boundaries in Dating,” By Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, on Thursday’s. “If you’re interested in attending this class, it’s on Thursday from 5:00 to 6:00 PM. You’ll need to send Mike your email address to get a link for the Zoom class. Send your email address to mike@applicablecoaching.com. You can sit in and listen or be a participant. These classes are free.

Do you feel like you’re living in fear all the time? Are you overcome and controlled by your fears and don’t know how move forward? Do you need help in trying to figure out and identify what your fears are? Do you want to know more about fears and how they can control us? Do you want help in managing and understanding your fears? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878.

If you are interested in any of these classes or have questions, send an email to mike@applicablecoaching.com or call 303.880.9878.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Zoom (if you want to have a Zoom meeting with Dr. Mike, send him an email at mike@applicablecoaching.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching and counseling for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

Unexplained Behaviors Explained? (15)

Unexplained Behaviors Explained? (15)

By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week, we will discover how yellows operate and how much fun they can be to the rest of the colors in the colorcode.

Yellows are happy people because we love life. We look at the bright side of life. Most yellows wake up happy and ready for the day. I was doing a zoom class on the colorcode, when we were talking about the yellows, someone asked me a question. Mike, when you wake up are you really happy? People that know me can answer that question with a resounding yes. I love waking up, the minute my feet hit the floor, I am up and ready for the day. I get excited about the day ahead of me. I look forward to meeting people and talking with them. I love my job and how helping others brings me joy. So, yes, a healthy yellow is pretty much happy all the time. Yellows appreciate what they have in their lives and don’t care what they don’t have.

The one area you can recognize a yellow is what we are; we’re chatter boxes; we love to talk about anything and everything. We enjoy sharing our stories with others. We can strike a conversation with anyone, anywhere at any given moment. We find almost everything interesting and will want to talk about it. We are curious people and like to hear people’s stories, where they have been, exciting adventures people have taken. While yes, we are chatter boxes, we get distracted pretty easily. When you want to get a serious conversation with a yellow, it’s hard for yellows to do that; yellows don’t generally want to, can’t, or won’t. Yellows are known for interrupting others in conversations or when others are busy doing something.

Yellows can be irresponsible at times; this is the negative side of the yellows. I questioned that, as a yellow, I had to sit back and do a self-evaluation, was I really irresponsible? I guess a few times I have been, and one such time I recall when I was. My dad owned a new home construction company and real estate office to sell these new homes he built. I was a junior in high school when he wanted me to work for him during the summer. I was excited at first, and the job I had to do was hard labor. I carried shingles, bags of cement, ladders, tools, whatever his older guys needed. After all, I was the teenage mule for his construction crew. After about three weeks of working for him, I heard about a church camp that I really wanted to attend. My buddies were telling me how exciting this was, food, girls, sports, games. I told my buddies I was in and planned to go. Instead of heading to work that Friday morning, I was packed and headed to the sand dunes in Indiana without telling a soul. I never told my dad or the foreman in my dad’s company; I just went and had a good time. My dad was not pleased whatsoever with me, in fact he was terribly upset, and he fired me. So, looking back, yep, I was irresponsible. As an adult, I’d have to say, no, I follow through with what I tell people that I’m going to do. I know of other yellows as adults who are extremely irresponsible (that is an unhealthy yellow).

Some unhealthy yellows feel that it’s someone else’s responsibility to take care of them, it doesn’t matter who, as long as someone else does it. The interesting thought behind this is that yellows are so fun to be around and engaging that people cannot see their limitations. Yellows will try to sprint to the finish line with a task or responsibility and rarely make it to the finish line. They get distracted by wanting to have fun in life. Yellows don’t like the pressure of responsibilities. One of the many reasons they get sidetracked. We love adventure!

Next week, we will continue to discover how yellows add spice to all the colorcode personalities.

Dr. Mike has Zoom classes on “Where to Draw the Line,” setting your boundaries by Anne Katherine, on Thursday’s. “If you’re interested in attending this class, it’s on Thursday from 5:00 to 6:00 PM. You’ll need to send Mike your email address to get a link for the Zoom class. Send your email address to mike@applicablecoaching.com. You can sit in and listen or be a participant. These classes are free.

Zoom classes in session: How to Set Boundaries for yourself, your kids, and marriage. There will be a class on the 5-Love Languages, how to have better relationships with your spouse, family, and friends. If you are interested in any of these classes or have questions, send an email to mike@applicablecoaching.com or call 303.880.9878.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Zoom (if you want to have a Zoom meeting with Dr. Mike, send him an email at mike@applicablecoaching.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!