If You’re Considering Divorce (4)
By Dr. Michael Brooks
This week I want you to take this self-quiz from Dr. Susan Heitler on how to rate yourself on ten warning signs of falling out of love that merit particular attention. This may be a wake-up call for some of you and hopefully, you can start working on your relationship.
Rate yourself from 0 to 3 on how true each of the following sentences is for you.
0= Not at all true
1 = Somewhat true
2 = Quite true
3 = Very true
The Falling Out of Love Warning Signs Quiz
___1. We have very few shared interests or times that we enjoy being together.
___2. Staying together is just not a priority for me, for my partner, or for both of us.
___3. Flirting with others appeals to me; so does sex with other partners.
___4. In my gut, I don’t see my partner as a truly good person.
___5. We have a hard time talking over differences constructively.
___6. I’d rather not talk about what bothers me than risk getting into arguments about it.
___7. I still resent some of the hurtful things my partner has said and done.
___8. There are things in my life that have disturbed me deeply; and/or my partner continues to be profoundly upset about something in his/her life, and we don’t talk about these experiences.
___9. I rarely feel playful or joyful; when I look ahead at my future I feel pretty bleak.
___10. I rarely express appreciation, affection, or gratitude toward my partner. Mostly I feel irritated.
___ TOTAL number of 0’s
___ TOTAL number of 1’s
___ TOTAL number of 2’s
___ TOTAL number of 3’s
How to interpret your score.
A score that’s all 0’s would be ideal. Few people are that perfect.
1’s and 2’s indicate areas where there’s room for improvement. The fewer the 1’s and 2’s, the more secure and connected you are to your loved one, and at the same time, even a little improvement in these areas is likely to make your relationship all the more loving.
Any 3’s mean danger ahead. Better do something right away about these. Check on getting counseling for you and your spouse.
Fortunately, if you catch these warning signs early, and especially if you add a quick upgrade to your communication skills toolkit, you will be likely to succeed in keeping your bonds of connection intact. Ignore these warning signs though, and the danger ahead is likely to grow over time.
Do you suspect that you’re falling out of love with your spouse? Do you feel like your relationship is drifting apart? Has the lack of love in your relationship caused your spouse/partner to cheat on you by using Facebook or Classmates.com? Have you seen the signs of them spending time texting excessively or on the computer? Do you need help in confronting your spouse/partners suspicious behavior? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow an old love to destroy your relationship. If your marriage has been threatened by or has ended because of a social media affair and you need someone to talk to, or need help in overcoming the pain you’re going through, please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people through the process of a broken relationship caused by social media infidelity.
Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at firstname.lastname@example.org to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!