I like most of you saw the instant replay of the last out of the perfect game pitched by Armando Galarrage.  That's when we all saw baseball umpire Jim Joyce call the runner safe. Then Jim Joyce did something highly unusual in this day and age of professional sports, he accepted responsibility and apologized. Did that shock you? I think what he did, took America by surprise!
 

Joyce said "I missed it, I missed it," Joyce barked, his voice at the extreme end of anguished. "I took a perfect game from that kid who pitched a perfect game. "It was the biggest call of my career and I kicked the (s**t) out of it. "I'm sorry. I had a great angle and I missed the call."

I have seen many blown calls by umpires, and refs in big games. I look at it as its part of life's displeasures. Mistakes are common events that happen to all of us. When we can admit we have caused a few of them ourselves so much the better. Joyce, came right out and said he had missed the cal, that cost someone a perfect game. When Detroit Tigers pitcher Galarrage forgave Joyce, both men shared in a class act the world shared in. Still Joyce had a very hard time forgiving himself.

Leyland heard about Joyce's psychological state in the Detroit Tigers clubhouse. "I gotta get over there," the Tigers manager said, heading for the doorway, and for the tunnel leading to the umpire's dressing room. Leyland returned 15 minutes later. "He's better now," the Tigers manager said, "forgiving an umpire who could not forgive himself."

So, what can we learn from these two about real life situations we face everyday? For many of us who have played in sports, and have used the team work concept to make us better people in life. Do you have a coach that needs some forgiveness, or another player you need to forgive? Being part of a team is like being in a close knit family. There are differences in families, and that's OK. Its important that you be able to talk out those differences! Coaches will try to keep harmony in the clubhouse, that's their job. Players have that same responsibility to keep the peace. As a professional athlete what fans say about you, should be taken to heart. I am not talking about your skill set on the field, but your attitude off the field. If your avoiding fans, are known for having a bad attitude and not friendly, that gets around.

Approachable players and coaches are great ambassadors for the game. If a umpire and player can show the world that both can get over a bad situation and move on, how much more should we strive for the same thing. Attitude is everything!

Who do you need to thank?
I was pondering early this morning the people who have impacted me the most during my lifetime. I tried to remember aunts and uncles, grandparents; I went through a long list of people in my life. My dad was a great example of being a strong leader in the family.  He was a colonel in the army lived by rules and by following them. My grandparents were all good people. But I never got to know them, because of all of our moving around the world. Aunts and uncles were an extension of our family, but again because of all the moving we did, I didn't get to know them that well.
 
So, my list widened by the people that I knew from my own created experiences. My first on the list would have to be my high school football coach Rod Hanson from Rich East high school in Park Forest, Illinois. He was a good man, was a quiet kind of man, and a guidance counselor at my high school. I remember that the other kids would make fun of him behind his back as we walked out to the practice field during summer camp. Rod was an all American football player from the University Of Illinois. He knew football and was a great coach. The reason the others made fun of him: he didn't swear, or tell bad jokes, or look foolish in front of the players. One day I decided to go to his office and ask him why he was so different from everyone else. I asked and he told my why. His answer changed my life forever.  I liked the way he treated his family, how he was involved in the community, and was the constant encourager. So, he made a big difference in my life.
 
My second influence was my best friend George; we grew up together in Park Forest, went to the same high school and church. George is a great friend and always there when I needed him. We have been in many battles together, some tough ones and others looking out for each other. He always knows when it’s best to say something or let it slide. His quest for being fair and non-judgmental has always inspired me. I know many who will look for a fight of any kind just to keep up their sparring skills, way too many folks like fighting.
 
The third influence in my life is my pastor and great friend (Greg Blake), I have seen mercy shown to everyone by this man. He gives it without blinking an eye. I have seen Greg laugh when no one else dare to say a word. He uses his humor to help the broken hearted, the weak, a rare breed of a man. His sermons are home runs; they speak to everyone sitting in the pews. They are healing sermons, comforting sermons, encouraging sermons. People will walk away with knowing they are loved no matter what they have done. Greg is a pastor who walks the walk and talks the talk. A man after Gods own heart!
 
The last one in this list is my older brother Bob, he is always upbeat and never gives up, and he will stay the course. You can call him, and he is telling you, never give up, stay in the game. Over the years Bob and I have had many things happen in our lives that would break most people. The loss of our parents, last year our younger sister passed away from cancer. It’s nice to know that he is always there and just a phone call away.
 
So, who do you have to be thankful for in your life? Notice that I have picked those living and someone I can write or call. That will be your assignment for this week. Make a list of those who you need to thank for making your life special. I would write them or call them, let them know how they made a difference in your life. Be detailed and hold nothing back. How many people have passed away without us telling them how much we loved them or how they changed our lives. I have regrets and many of them without sharing a word of how they impacted my life. Do you have someone that would benefit from your kind words?
 
I would start by making your list of those who you want to write, or call. This list can be as long as you like it to be. List the persons name and then list why they were special to you. When you contact them, let them know. The response from your call or letter will be amazing; you will bring joy and delight to someone who may just need to hear what you have to say to them. Have you received a good call or encouraging letter unexpectedly, how did you feel when you read it? I bet it made your day, week or month. Did you ever throw that letter away? I bet you didn't and you still have it in your desk or in a file. I save all of mine and will look at them from time to time when I am having a bad day.
 
So, let’s start by making that list, send the letter or make that call, and let me know what happens. You can change lives with very little effort on your part. Keep me posted on the blog, and let's see what how we can change lives together.
 
If you have asked yourself any of these questions "Who do I need to thank?", you can contact Dr. Mike for help in setting up a list to tell people you appreciate them and want to thank them.
 
If you would like some help in setting up boundaries in your life, or if the relationship that you're in is not going well, you can contact Dr. Mike at 303.456.0555, Life Coaching is done over the phone, so there is no reason to leave your home or office.
 
How does Life Coaching work? You'll meet once a week, by phone, for a one-on-one conference, usually 45 minutes a session. In each phone conference you'll plan and review, together, each of your "Focus Goals" and action areas. In each session, you'll also receive support and guidance in creating the right attitudes and motivation in the area's that you want to work on most. In addition to the weekly phone conferences, you'll also communicate by e-mail, so you'll have help and support throughout the week.
 
If you need more information about the Professional Accountability Partner Program, call 303.456.0555 or go to contact Mike link to set up a free consultation appointment. Dr. Mike's website is www.applicablecoaching.com all calls are confidential and your privacy is protected. Check out Mike's blog at: http://applicablecoaching.com/blog.php I always welcome your thoughts and comments on today's coaching article. Mike is also available for speaking engagements.

Well, this is my first article in a few weeks. I had major back surgery 
last week. That operation was something else, and believe me, I am glad that I had it done. I am one for taking care of health problems before they become a serious problem. Back pain can take you out of action real quick and for expended periods of time. How many friends do you personally know had bad hips and backs and you would hear them complain about all their pain?

My hip pain started last year, would ache for several hours, then when I
sat down and rested it would get better over a few hours. This went on for several months. Finally, I had enough of this and went and saw my primary care physician. He referred me to a hip surgeon.  After receiving an MRI of the hip, I met with the hip surgeon and he said that, the hip looks fine, I was then referred to another hip surgeon to have a better look at the MRI.

He concluded that the MRI was indeed good, except for a little 
arthritis. I could live with that. So, he ordered an MRI of the low back. The insurance company said, we need 6 weeks of PT before they would approve another MRI on my low back.
 
Believe it or not the PT made things so bad that I could hardly walk after each PT session. I screamed inside from the pain of each  and every step walking back from PT to my truck. The Physical therapist said, "Mike, no more PT for you!" The insurance company finally agreed for the back MRI.

I went in and had it done on a Tuesday morning. As I was being taken off the MRI table,  the tech walked over to me and asked if I was going to see the surgeon right  away that day. I said No, I had no plans to, then she said, are you seeing him  in the afternoon. I said no, I was thinking that I had a hip problem.

She said  "son, you don't have a hip problem, but a major back
problem, and that I would  get a phone call by the time I get home by a surgeon. She was right on, the call came as I was eating lunch at home. The gal on the phone, said we need you to come in right away. I said OK, when, she said right away.

I was in the next day, the orthopedic surgeon said that my
back  was really damaged, I had a L-3, L-4, crushed nerve and a stress fracture of L-4 and a 8 Cm crushed  nerve. So, we scheduled surgery a few days later and the rest is history.
 
I am  glad that I had the surgery, its been slow healing, and rehab will
take its  time. I see some great pain relief, and I am looking forward to
that. In a few  months, I will be doing the things I used to do. But, what I have I learned during this time, that would be listen to my body! If its hurting, then we need to get a visit into the doctor.

My point for another Life Coaching article about your health  and getting
things fixed was to look out for each of you. I was at a great  hospital, and the staff was great. If you don't take of health  issues now, they will get worse, that I can promise you! My tips for this week, if you have something wrong with you, something does not feel right, GO SEE YOUR DOCTOR!!
 
The problem will not go away, and probably can be fixed and taken care of pretty easily. Call me and lets talk, lets look at your options, I want to help you through the process, its not scary if all the cards on the table. The unknown is what fears most people with health issues.  It scared me, but I knew that I had to have the facts, and what all my options were.

That's where I can help you. If you need someone who will go the distance with you, talk you through the process, help you understand your options, we should talk. There are great Doc's out there that can help you and really do care about you. Please call me and we can talk this over. I would be more then happy to sit down with a family setting, or as a group from church. We are all in this together, we are family, call me if you have any questions. United we stand for our health, don't back away, what you do know may save your life in the future!
 
Ask yourself these questions:

·  Do I need help in setting my health goals?

·  Do I need to get out bad healthy habits that may hurt me?

·  Am I in trouble with my doctor, because I am not listening to his/her advice?

·  Is my life upside down because I have no means of support from friends and family, all they hear me do is complain about my health?

If you have asked yourself any of these questions, you can contact Dr. Mike for help in setting up boundaries for yourself. Get back on the road to recovery!

If you would like some help in setting up boundaries in your life, or if the relationship that you're in is not going well, you can contact Dr. Mike at 303.456.0555, Life Coaching is done over the phone, so there is no reason to leave your home or office.

How does Life Coaching work? You'll meet once a week, by phone, for a one-on-one conference, usually 45 minutes a session. In each phone conference you'll plan and review, together, each of your "Focus Goals" and action areas. In each session, you'll also receive support and guidance in creating the right attitudes and motivation in the area's that you want to work on most. In addition to the weekly phone conferences, you'll also communicate by e-mail, so you'll have help and support throughout the week.

If you need more information about the Professional Accountability Partner Program, call 303.456.0555 or go to contact Mike link to set up a free consultation appointment. Dr. Mike's website is www.applicablecoaching.com all calls are confidential and your privacy is protected. Check out Mike's blog at: http://applicablecoaching.com/blog.php I always welcome your thoughts and comments on today's coaching article. Mike is also available for speaking engagements.

I was at King Soopers last week, in the deli department. I stood and waited for my turn. A young woman in her 30's stepped in front of me and two other women who had been waiting in line for about 5 minutes. She said out loud, as she raised her hand "excuse me; I would like to place an order." The woman in the red coat behind her said "you better get in line there are 3 of us ahead of you." Again, without missing a beat, the woman called out again, "I need someone to take my order, and I am in a hurry." The gal in the red coat and the other woman, started to tell her, you better get in line, there are three people ahead of you, and she pointed at me as one of those ahead of her. Now, this was now starting to get interesting!

More people were getting in line as this was around lunch time. The woman was persistent, insisting that she be waited on, no matter who was in line ahead of her. Finally one of the deli people walked up to where she was standing and said, ma’am ... you’re going to have to get in line and wait your turn - there are people ahead of you!

When she heard the deli manager tell her that, she blew her temper, she lost it right then and there, her anger was very clear! She started accusing all of us treating her with disrespect. She had an audience of 15 people watching and listening to her. Finally the store manager showed up. She proceeded to rip on him as well.

I started to wonder if she realizes the spectacle she was making of herself. People began to whisper, some even started talking out loud and letting her know that she was out of line. I have seen several disgruntled shoppers during my lifetime. I was embarrassed for them and how foolish they looked with onlookers glaring at them. There was anger in the air, from her and those who listened to her.

This woman kept the pressure up until, one of the deli workers assisted her to get her to quiet down. I was embarrassed for her, the people she offended and for myself. As I waited for my turn, I listened to the complaints of others. Many were harsh with judging her, while others didn't seem to care. I tried looking at why her outburst happened. I figured she was having a really bad day, as we all do at times.

I like to look at all sides of the picture. Did she have an argument with her spouse? Did her kids get on her nerves, that morning? Was she having a bad day at the office? There could be many reasons for the way she acted. I like to give the benefit of the doubt. I have seen my own friends act up once in a while, so for me, no big deal. I was entertained that morning, that's how I saw it.

So what do you do when you feel like your going to lose it? Do you continue your behavior, or do you walk away from a bad situation? I would be interested in hearing how you deal with the storms in your life. So let's figure this lady at the deli was very angry. Angry emotions include being irritated, resentful, enraged to losing it. So, what message are you sending when you get angry at others? You are telling others that you have been violated by someone or maybe yourself. You just can't cope with it anymore.

How do you deal with anger so it does not become a personal problem for you? First of all you should realize that people who make you angry may not know your boundaries and why you’re upset! You may have misinterpreted what they have said or done. You need to talk with the offender face to face, and get things ironed out immediately. Your boundaries may be unrealistic and you may have to reevaluate them, after you talk with the person who made you angry!

One of the ways you can stop your anger is to look at the person who made you angry, do they care about you, and do they have your best interests at heart? When you get angry at people, ask yourself this question; what can I learn from this person? How can I help them understand how I am feeling without getting angry at them? Sometimes we don't communicate our wants and desires with friends and acquaintances, that's key to understanding yourself. Do you need to be a better communicator? Then work on your communication skills, learn the art of sharing what your feelings are with others. It takes lots of patience and practice to be good at sharing your feelings where people can clearly understand what you are saying.

I watched while my football team was getting beat up on the football field that late fall October day. We were getting outplayed by a great football team. Their offense was crisp; the defense crushed us all day. This was not a pretty game to watch or play in. When you play on the college level, your team mates are to keep their negative thoughts to themselves unless it benefits the team. I heard starters saying things that any coach would have benched them for.

One of my offensive linemen was complaining about the officials not doing their job. The line judge was missing calls he exclaimed, all the while this guy was getting outplayed by a star freshman lineman. I realize that in the heat of battle, we must take responsibility for our own mistakes. Any coach who is worth his weight in salt will observe and make changes that are necessary to win a game, that's their job as a college coach.

There have been only a few occasions that I have seen and heard a player ask the coach to take him out of a game. Why? Because he was not doing the job needed to win a game, and realized the team was more important then his starting position. Now that's a class act! In the game of life, have you ever known anyone, who was over their heads at work, tell their boss, please find someone else who can do this job? It's out of my league; I am not qualified or competent to do it. Very few people do this, as they might get fired.

We all get frustrated at times in our lives, in our homes and on the job. We all probably can remember a time that we wanted to throw in the towel, but didn't. We simply were frustrated with a bad situation and saw no way out of it.

I was as a freshman Football coach at the U of Wisconsin; I loved working with college kids. The level at which these kids played ball was at the top of their game. Football players get frustrated very easily; their skill set is second to none. The reason these kids are in division 1 colleges, they are the best in the country. They have the best athletic ability and were given scholarships based on how well they played and performed in high school.

To play at this level, there are skill sets colleges look at. Speed, strength, agility and flexibility. To play in any of the top colleges in this country, you must have all of these in place. I know these kids get frustrated very easily. You spend hours at practice, in the weight room and you have to keep your grades up! I can remember trying to keep my grades up, while working out in the weight room. I had my school books, in the weight room; it was a hard balance to maintain a good grade point average. I would Read science text books and pump iron at the same time.

So, how did I deal with my frustrations, well I first had to define them! Anytime we are making an effort and not getting anything in return we will feel the emotion of frustration. It comes in many forms such as, road blocks, barriers, hurdles, etc. All self imposed for the most part. There are mixed messages to being frustrated, one being that, you think that should be doing better then you really are. At least you can modify your behavior and can overcome your frustration. You know something's not working for you and you need to make some changes to make it happen. Write down a game plan, what is it that you must do to overcome frustration? What is your first immediate reaction? Have that written down and take notes as you adjust for future frustrations. I did that and it helped a great deal. I kept track of what worked and what didn't! I looked to hang around positive people, people who didn't live in the past and make excuses for being frustrated. I wrote in my journals, how I over came frustrations. I identified a list of possible actions that I could take, what worked and what didn't. Try some of these suggestions, they do work.

If you feel that you are in a holding pattern with your frustrations and want some help in dealing with it, you can contact Dr. Mike Brooks to help you! The more frustration you are able to deal with, you will get resolve and overcome it. Avoiding frustration, hiding from frustration, is not the answer, face it head on!

If you need coaching in dealing with frustration you can contact Dr. Mike Brooks by phone or his website. Here are some questions that might help you decide if you need additional coaching. Are you frustrated with work or home? Do need help in overcoming your frustrations, how to deal with them? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you should call for an appointment.

How does Life Coaching work? You'll meet once a week, by phone, for a one-on-one conference, usually 45 minutes a session. In each phone conference you'll plan and review, together, each of your "Focus Goals" and action areas. In each session, you'll also receive support and guidance in creating the right attitudes and motivation in the area's that you want to work on most. In addition to the weekly phone conferences, you'll also communicate by e-mail, so you'll have help and support throughout the week.

If you need more information about the Professional Accountability Partner Program, call 303.456.0555 or go to contact Mike link to set up a free consultation appointment. Dr. Mike's website is www.applicablecoaching.com all calls are confidential and your privacy is protected. Check out Mike's blog at: http://applicablecoaching.com/blog.php I always welcome your thoughts and comments on today's coaching article. Mike is also available for speaking engagements.