Facing Your Giants (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week we will continue my article on Facing Your Giants. First, let’s look at what causes some of the giants we face. So my question for you today is: what are the Giants you’re facing and need help confronting today? You may have one or several Giants that control you; over the next several weeks, we’ll address several of them you may be facing. First, I will share with you one of my biggest Giants: Abandonment. I was raised in a military family, and we moved worldwide. We never stayed in one place very long, and it was rare that you would make any real friends because you’d soon move to another base. My parents were always at officers’ parties in the evening, and my sister and I were dropped off at the babysitters on the base. As soon as my sister and I found out that another night was going to be spent at the babysitter’s, I would beg not to go. I was only six years old and remembered feeling abandoned by my mom and dad. That was a painful childhood memory and stayed with me until I finally dealt with the problem. So, I’ll sit back and reminisce and ask myself, what are the Giants I have stored in the back of my mind and want to get rid of? I knew I needed help and wanted to have a clear conscience. So what are your giants, and what are your next steps to deal with them?

I will cover the ones I know personally and have helped my clients deal with in a one-on-one counseling/coaching session. Let’s talk if you relate to any of these and want to come to some resolution in eliminating them. I have some great idea’s on how to resolve them. Don’t let your Giants hold you back from becoming all you can be or do. Let’s look at these Giants and how to deal with them.

Fear, what are you fearful of? Fear can hold you back in many ways. It can prevent you from moving forward in your family, life, and work. Here is a definition of fear: an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain or a threat. Fear has many names and strikes many of us at all levels. The fear of death is very real for most people, especially people over the age of 60 years old. When I talk to people about death, I ask them what is their biggest fear, believe it or not, dying alone! I am a pretty positive person, and I ask them about family and friends and do they have close people in their lives. Then I ask them about their health, are they exercising and eating right? I give them a talk about how they can improve their health by living a healthy lifestyle. Fear of death can be looked at in a logical way, and solutions can be found if only you focus on finding answers. . Next week we will continue the article facing your giants and see if any of the giants you face are ones others face as well.

Do you need help in overcoming the giants of your past? Do you struggle with memories of broken relationships, illness, self-worth, and confidence? What are the giants that you currently face and need help defeating them? Giants can be debilitating and keep you from enjoying life and successful life. Call Dr. Mike, and he can help you through the process of taking your giants head-on and help you to move forward with your life. Why live in a defeated and hurtful past when you can enjoy a stress-free present and future?

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Zoom (if you want to Zoom with Dr. Mike, send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call at 303.880.9878! You’ll be glad you did!

Facing Your Giants (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

As I was walking out of the grocery store to put my grocery cart away, I turned and suddenly stood face to-face with the old town gossip just two feet away. I and many others have been talked about by this woman in our small community. My mind raced as I looked at her and as she stared at me. I froze, I wanted to tell her off, yet my mind prevented me from exposing the town gossip. I would have enjoyed doing this, but I couldn’t bring myself to be like this woman. Why? I had every reason to let loose on her, right? I mean, she had attacked me and lied and gossiped.

I know others have been hurt by her gossip; why not just expose her, and humiliate her at the only grocery store in town? The giant that I faced in this situation was (revenge) what would have happened if I had done such a thing? I would have stooped to her level and probably paid the price for it. I decided to keep the peace and not say a thing. When we face our giants, we must look at them logically and proceed. In this next series of articles, we will look at some of the giants we all face and how to deal with them.

What are the Giants you currently face, and which ones hold you back from enjoying everyday life? We all have those giants staring us in the face every day, and we most likely avoid dealing with them and wish they’d just go away. Many we’ve kept hidden for years only to find that they have robbed us of enjoying life and being happy.

Many of these Giants have been in our heads as far back as we can remember, for many of us, since we were children and some as adults. Think about this for a minute, what are these Giants that you are holding on to and want to let go of today? What are the names of these Giants that grip you and cause you to hide in your emotional closet? There are many Giants we have hidden and tucked away in our minds until we are forced to deal with them. Either we recoil and run away from them or face them and cower in silence and look the other way. Next week we will continue the article facing your giants and see if any of the giants you face are ones others face as well.

Do you need help in overcoming the giants of your past? Do you struggle with memories of broken relationships, illness, self-worth, and confidence? What are the giants that you currently face and need help defeating them? Giants can be debilitating and keep you from enjoying life and successful life. Call Dr. Mike, and he can help you through the process of taking your giants head-on and help you to move forward with your life. Why live in a defeated and hurtful past when you can enjoy a stress-free present and future?

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Zoom (if you want to Zoom with Dr. Mike, send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

Did you know that most attorneys are not trained to act as Counselors or Divorce Coaches and cannot provide the proper emotional support that their clients need? As a result, the attorney and client spend hours discussing the emotional aspects of divorce and the client ends up paying a large bill and receives little more than a shoulder to cry on. Attorneys want to help you with the legal aspects of your divorce, not to be your Divorce coach or counselor. That’s not their job!

Many of my clients come to me with little or no energy left to accomplish what they want out of life (life’s battles). They say that there always seems to be a mountain to climb (major problem), and for others, a wall (major disaster) to run into. Does this sound familiar?

Divorce Coaching offers structure and holds clients responsible for assuming a proactive role. A Coach may recommend material for clients to read, work on, or refer to for future use. Clients can benefit by working with a Coach in setting realistic expectations for the process and receiving education about the options available for divorce. Being informed and prepared helps clients make important decisions with confidence. Guiding clients in clarifying their thoughts, needs, and concerns, in order to communicate more effectively, is another important function of the Coach. Clear, purposeful, and rational communication helps to ease tension and foster understanding between spouses, as well as parents and children.

Much like any crisis or trauma, the early emotions of a pending divorce include shock, disbelief, denial, anger, and the pain associated with the loss. Once the early emotions have been experienced, there is a need for people going through a divorce to make sure they continue to take the necessary steps in moving toward recovery. As with any significant loss that involves a meaningful relationship, divorce can lead someone to a place of anger, bitterness, and lonely despair. Dr. Mike will walk you through the critical role of forgiveness in divorce recovery. Especially when it comes to wrestling with issues, like trying to prove who’s right or wanting to get even.

In addition, many divorcing couples wind up in the traditional litigation route because they are reacting to fear, anger, and a desire for getting even and are not thinking about what will happen once the divorce battle has ended.

After the grief process has run its course, divorced men and women must begin to consider their next steps in getting back to a healthy level of functioning. While this may not necessarily mean starting a new romance there is a need to take stock and evaluate relationships with family members and friends.

Part of building a new life is the acceptance of having been divorced. There are key issues in starting over, these include the need to avoid a victim mindset, having a balanced life and building self-esteem, and considering the future in terms of family, jobs, and finances.

After the grief process has run its course, divorced men and women must begin to consider their next steps in getting back to a healthy level of functioning. While this may not necessarily mean starting a new romance there is a need to take stock and evaluate relationships with family members and friends.

Did you know that…
Americans divorce more than any country in the history of the world.
The divorce rate has increased in the U.S. every decade since 1890.

Dynamics of Divorce Coaching:
Delayed and later-life marriages are the norm for society today.
Divorce is often a lengthy process that can last for years.
The person who often seeks divorce coaching is the one who did not initiate the divorce proceedings.
Divorce coaches help repair and rebuild a life.
How the biological parents dealt with divorce literally determined the future of their sons and daughters.

What Divorce Coaching will do for you:
Help you manage the early emotions.
Move you towards acceptance.
Process the grief and loss.
Understand the grief cycle.
Do’s and don’t’s in your divorce.
Forgiveness and letting go.
Building a new life.
The Five Keys to starting over.
Barriers to new relationships.
Finding new relationships.
Now what? Living in a blended family.

Are you in the process of Divorce? Do you have a relationship that isn’t working, or that you want to improve and work on? Is your marriage in trouble, and is there still hope of reconciliation? Or do you need to end an unhealthy relationship? If you answered yes to any of these, I can help you as a Divorce Coach. You can call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878 if you have any questions.

Avoid the Wrong Kind of People (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week we will talk about how to deal with gossips in your married life and the problems they can cause and how to avoid them. If your marriage is in trouble and you are looking for someone of the opposite sex to talk to about your marriage problems and think this is a good idea, think again. If you are having problems in your marriage, avoid these marriage killers.

• Avoid sharing your personal marriage problems with the opposite sex
• Don’t compare your spouse to others
• Don’t seek advice from known gossips
• Don’t meet the opposite sex for drinks after work
• Avoid being alone with someone you’re attracted to
• Avoid after work phone calls

Another group of people to avoid are the gossips in your life. They are the backbone of people spreading lies and disinformation. Ask yourself what is the purpose of gossiping about someone? Does gossip benefit the person being talked about? Gossips have caused much division in families, work, schools, and friends. I’ve learned over the years that those who gossip usually have no loyalty to anyone. They are despised by all. If you share any confidential information with a gossip, then plan on many knowing something that you shared in confidence. Never share your marriage problems with a gossip.

I shared a story a while back, and I like the storyline on this. The article “How to Stop A gossip in Their tracks,” By Dr. Michael Brooks, gave an example of dealing with a gossip in a church setting. I loved the setup of a gossip being caught in her own trap. Here is the story for your enjoyment.

Mildred, the church gossip stayed busy sticking her nose into other people’s business. Several members did not approve of her extracurricular activities but feared her enough to maintain their distance and silence.

She made a critical mistake one day when she accused Frank, a new church member, of being an alcoholic. She claimed she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town’s only bar one afternoon. She accused Frank in front of several church members that she saw his truck parked in front of the bar and wanted to know what he was doing there! Frank, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn’t explain or defend himself or deny anything.

Later that evening, Frank quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred’s house and walked home. He intentionally left it parked at her home all night!! (You gotta love Frank!) Needless to say, Mildred’s days of gossiping came to an abrupt end.

Don’t you just love how Mildred became the talk of the town? I wonder how many people laughed when they heard she was now the victim of her own gossip.

Next week I will explain the T.H.I.N.K. system and how that will keep you out of trouble and avoid the gossips in your life.

Are you afraid to confront the wrong kind of people in your life? Are you involved in a wrong kind of relationship and need help getting out of it? Do you have friends who are involved with drugs, alcohol and want you to join them, and you can’t say NO? Would you like a plan that can help you eliminate the wrong kind of people in your life? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then contact Dr. Mike for personal help and planning your next steps at 303.880.9878.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Life Coaching and Counseling Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone (303.880.9878) or via Zoom. The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of the Denver-metro area. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

Start Your Impossibility Journey (3)

By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week, we will continue with making your impossibilities a reality with hard work and planning!

My friends if people are telling you, your dreams and goals are impossible, show them by making them happen. I am talking about realistic goals. The impossible dreams can the mental goals, like getting an education, starting a business, these are the visions, the dreams many of us have. Then you have the physical goals, like getting healthy, kicking bad habits, exercising your way into shape. Looking back, I wasn’t cut out to play basketball, I didn’t have much desire to play basketball, but the weight lifting and football, yes, that I enjoyed, and the baseball career could have been a realistic dream, but, I wanted to play football instead of baseball.

Now, what are your impossible dreams, goals, and visions? Have you been told there is no way you can achieve them? They are impossible? If so, did you just give up and forget about them? Are the impossibilities still wandering around in that brain of yours? They just won’t go away; they linger on and keep you thinking about them? I suggest that your impossibilities need to be brought back to life and given a second look.

Many of you have been told that you’re too slow to go to college or a trade school. If that’s the case, then maybe you should start looking into fulfilling that dream by checking into schools near you or online schools. We set the limitations on how far we can go in life, others shouldn’t dictate that for you. If you had bad grades, then start by getting some help and making things happen. Remember, you have to aggressively go after your dreams, goals, and visions. They will not always fall into your lap. You have to decide what’s impossible to do. For example, you can’t add inches to your height to make you a better basketball player, right? You can develop skills on the court that will make up for the lack of size. You may never have millions in the bank, but you can research and invest wisely to live comfortably and provide for yourself and your family.

How many of you want to start a business? You may have ambitions of using your passions to make a living, as many of us have and enjoyed a successful career. What is holding you back? Lack of research, funds, education, or is it lack of motivation? Whatever is holding you back, you need to sit down and make a list of those things and work on eliminating them from your list.

I wanted to own a fitness center since I was in college; I was still going to the University of Wisconsin, taking classes and trying to figure out how I could make this happen. I was looking down the road of 5 to 10 years to make this a reality. First, I had to finish my degree and then get a job and save money for this dream of mine. While going to the U of Wisconsin, I got a part-time job at UPS working the pre-sort (unloading 40-foot trailers) in the early morning (3:30 AM). I was getting my education paid for and saving money by this part-time job. Meanwhile, I was doing my due diligence in how to start and own a fitness center. When I finished my degree, I worked part-time at UPS and part-time at a clinic in a small town where I lived. I began to check out places to open a fitness center in the area I lived. I checked out vacant buildings, storefronts, and pole barns. I started to check into the kind of gym equipment I would need to have when I opened my center. All this was exciting as I researched to make my impossible dream come true. I had the naysayers; oh, you can’t make a gym work in this town, it’s too small. I had many people tell me it’s impossible and don’t waste my time.

Next week, we will continue how to make your impossibilities become real with hard work and determination.

Dr. Mike has Zoom classes on “Boundaries in Dating,” By Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, on Mondays starting on January 10^th, 2022. “If you’re interested in attending this class, it’s on Monday from 6:00 to 7:00 PM (MDT). You’ll need to send Mike your email address to get a link for the Zoom class. Send your email address to mike@applicablecoaching.com. You can sit in and listen or be a participant. These classes are free.

If you are interested in any of these classes or have questions, send an email to mike@applicablecoaching.com or call 303.880.9878.

Do you feel like you’ve had people tell you that your dreams are impossible to achieve? Are you overcome by how big the impossibilities are that you face? Do you need help in making your impossibilities a reality? Do you want to know to overcome the fear of facing your impossibilities? Do you want help in managing your goals to make the impossibilities happen? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Zoom (if you want to have a Zoom meeting with Dr. Mike, send him an email at mike@applicablecoaching.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching and counseling for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

By Dr. Michael Brooks

I look back at my life and have seen many great opportunities I have missed because I was overcome with the term “it’s impossible.” The word impossible was a roadblock for me; it kept me from becoming an explorer in my own life. I missed several opportunities growing up. I can remember very well several people telling me you can’t do this or do that! My first experience being told that I was too small to play basketball was when I was six years old. The army base that we lived on was in Schweinfurt, Germany. The AYA was the (American Youth Association) sports program for military kids. They had football, baseball, and basketball leagues for all age groups. I remember my dad encouraging me to try basketball, so I went to the base gym with my older brother Bob.

I tried dribbling, and I wasn’t very good at it, I was afraid to shoot at the backboard because the backboard was made out of a clear plastic that looked like a window, and I was afraid that I would break it. Let’s just say, I wasn’t basketball material. Our first game was on a Saturday, and I had two practices under my belt. My mom made me a lunch to take on the bus, I showed up, and as I was getting on the bus, the coach said I was going, I was too small to play against the big boys. I was crushed. I walked home and was greeted by my mom when I walked through the door. She must have gotten a phone call from the coach that I wasn’t going to the game. I remember her saying that some things we want to do just don’t work out, and that’s OK!

The following spring, I was now seven years old; my dad said that I should try out for baseball. That was a fiasco, even for a kid who never played before. I got my uniform, went to a few practices, and then we had our first game. My mom and dad attended my first baseball game ever and were very supportive. Keep in mind my dad played football and baseball at the University of Minnesota. I stepped up to the plate and took a few practice swings, then the coach pitched the ball (we didn’t have Tee-ball back then), and I swung hard and sent that ball deep into the outfield over the head of the outfielder. I didn’t know which base to run to; I started to run to third base instead of first base; the umpire at home plate ran over and directed me to first base, the first base coach ran with me to second base, and told me to stay there. I heard parents laughing on the sidelines, and I wondered why? When my parents told me on the way home, I laughed too.

I’ve learned many life lessons from my time in sports as a kid and as an adult. What I was told was impossible; I made it possible with hard work and my faith in God.

Growing up on the south side of Chicago in the suburbs was a blessing in disguise. There were all kinds of trouble a kid could get into. Because of the sports I was involved in, I focused on playing sports with my friends that lived on my block. We played street football, went to the park to play baseball. Pick-up games were the norm back then. We played for hours on end and wouldn’t get home until after dark. I realized that finding good friends wasn’t impossible as long as you had the right ones in your life.

Next week, we will continue how to make your impossibilities become real with hard work and determination.

Dr. Mike has Zoom classes on “Boundaries in Dating,” By Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, on Monday. “If you’re interested in attending this class, it’s on Monday from 6:00 to 7:00 PM. You’ll need to send Mike your email address to get a link for the Zoom class. Send your email address to mike@applicablecoaching.com. You can sit in and listen or be a participant. These classes are free.

If you are interested in any of these classes or have questions, send an email to mike@applicablecoaching.com or call 303.880.9878.

Do you feel like you’ve had people tell you that your dreams are impossible to achieve? Are you overcome by how big the impossibilities are that you face? Do you need help in making your impossibilities a reality? Do you want to know to overcome the fear of facing your impossibilities? Do you want help in managing your goals to make the impossibilities happen? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Zoom (if you want to have a Zoom meeting with Dr. Mike, send him an email at mike@applicablecoaching.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching and counseling for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

Don’t Allow Fear to Control You! (3)

By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week, we will continue on how to deal with your fears so you can understand how to manage them. Fears don’t always have to be hidden and cause embarrassment. Dealing with them will give you freedom.

So, let’s look into some of the reasons what cause our fears and how we deal with them. Most experts say that there isn’t one particular cause for our fears, I’d say there are several good reasons why we have Fear in our lives. Many people cannot pinpoint when their fears began. So, let’s look at some examples and causes of those fears in a nutshell.

Past incidents, fears, and traumas: For example, me jumping off a roof and the Fear of the actual height looking down at the ground when falling, it has had a lasting effect on how I feel about heights to this day. I have a friend whose two daughters were attacked by a neighbor’s dog when they were toddlers. When a dog comes near them and I mean any dog, they lose it, they scream, yell and cry, these kids are 8 and 9 years old. They will never forget the dog attack as long as they live. Maybe when they become adults, they will be able to deal with dogs, but for now, they have a real fear of dogs.

How do you react to fear or panic? You may have had a fear that controlled you growing up, or even as an adult from a situation or object you encountered. Think about how many of us growing up, were told by our parents not to talk to strangers or avoid strangers. Our parents would tell us stories about what could happen if we did. We could get kidnapped, or even worse than we’d never see our families again. Many adults to this day will avoid talking to people they don’t know. They still have that fear of strangers that their parents scared them with. There is nothing wrong with that mindset today, many kids are being abducted and need to know they need to run away from someone approaching them. Fear can be very healthy as long as it’s used to be a learning lesson.

Long-term fear can cause anxiety and cause you to have depression if not dealt with in a proper way. Fear can keep you from enjoying life to its fullest and cause you to avoid events and people. Family gatherings can be difficult to attend for those who fear closeness. I know I struggled with being at our family gatherings because I was extremely shy. I hated going and seeing family at these reunions. I know I was anxious for sure and begged my parents not to take me. I’ve overcome that fear over the years.

As I was researching this article, I found some very interesting tidbits of information, do you know what one of the longest words in the dictionary is? I was amazed by this: What is Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia?  I find it funny, the meaning of the word and, and in an ironic twist, is the name for a fear of long words. I never imagined that words cause people to fear.

So, how do I overcome my fears you may ask? There are many scientific ways of dealing with your fears. I want to make this easy for you and just give you my Readers Digest version.

Next week, we will continue with “Don’t Allow Fear to Control You.” Learn how to deal with these thoughts on Fear so they don’t control you.