I am so angry, What do I do now?
“What, what, what is going on here?” echoed throughout the car. Then deafening silence set in. I was hurt, angry and crushed by her words. How could she confess her undying love for me at lunch and then arrange to have her things moved out of our home the same day? Looking back I know why I experienced a rush of emotions. My wife was rejecting me as her husband, lover and best friend. My mind raced as I realized I had been caught off guard. Like many, I trembled at the thought of rejection and soon feelings of rage consumed me.
What are some healthy ways in dealing with anger, hurt and rejection? It’s ok to be angry. As a matter of fact I encourage it as long as it’s handled with self-constraint. I also recommend avoid arguments. Work at keeping the peace. This is especially important if you have children. If you know you have an anger problem I urge you to admit it. Denying it and pretending it doesn’t exist won’t make it go away. Discover what it is that makes you angry then find ways to avoid the people, places, words or actions that set you off. I found that I needed a confidant I could trust and share my deep hurts and pain with. I gave my confidant permission to say the things I needed to hear. I didn’t need him to protect me. I needed him to be brutally honest with me. After we would talk I would take long walks and think about the things we had discussed. As I look back I see how vitally important my accountability partner was to me as I navigated those dark days. I encourage you to find someone you can confide in.
How do you deal with your anger? Do you suppress it? Do you have someone you can talk to when you get angry?
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